{thankful for}

these handmade toy chests each of my children has been given. made by my father, and brother, and painted by my sister.

i captured the trains being transfered from Ben's chest to Sophie's, as she seems to play with them far more often now. i am thankful for this moment of sharing amongst siblings.

{in the best of times, it looks like this. and my heart swells.}

{thankful for}

...a hint of cool weather coming

...a welcoming group of mom's

...my job, my coworkers, the flexiable schedule that allows me to work just enough

...my sisters

it was one of those mornings.

we headed outside, and i felt those feelings fade.

so, it seems, did they.

i am always grateful for the calming of the sun, the grass, the blue skies, the trees.

we headed up to the lake this afternoon. the smell of pine needles on a warm, sunny day so strong. it's one of my fondest memories from visits to my grandparent's cottage in rural New Hampshire as a child. i hope my children will come to know this smell, too.

i'm amazed at how few people were there on such a beautiful fall afternoon. when i feel as though i'm not doing a good enough job, i feel comforted by the fact that my children love being outside, and never miss a chance to explore.

what's real right now...

what's real now :: i've been working several evenings during the week + a full day on Saturday, and Sunday afternoons, in an effort to get in some extra hours before i'm likely unemployeed come the new year. i miss our family time together, as it feels like there's a whole bunch of solo parenting going on lately. grateful that this stretch of work will only last a few more weeks.

what's real now :: ben started Kindergarten, and i'm so thankful the transition has gone well. while there's been a few mornings when he's said he wants to stay home, he inevitably hops out of the car at carpool, excited for the new day. hoping he continues to love school.

what's real now :: working on helping him cope with emotions when he gets frustrated or angry. searching for strategies to help him when he gets upset so that he's able to deal instead of throw a fit or call names. trying really hard to model how we cope when frustrated or angry, and to consistently remain calm. this seems to go in phases - some really good stretches of time with no problems, and then a few more challenging days in a row. i'm working on not taking this as a direct indiction that i'm failing at this parenting gig.

what's real now :: grateful for some structure to my days, now that school has started up. joined two playgroups, going to storytime, volunteering in the media center at Ben's school... i'm finding that a tentitive schedule for my weekday mornings really helps my mental well-being.

what's real now :: sophie transitioned to preschool beautifully... i'm amazed at how independant she is. she seems totally unphased when i drop her off in the morning, and has taken to repeating things she hears at school. i love listening to her chatter on the way home. she suddenly seems so much bigger - definately moving into being a kid, and leaving toddlerhood behind.

what's real now :: so grateful for some one-on-one time with my sweet baby girl. it's felt a bit like she's just along for the ride in our family, given her easy going temperment, and her more vocal brother and sister. trying to will time to slow down just a bit to enjoy this last go round of parenting an infant.

what's real now :: wanting to get back to running, and train for another 5k or sprint triathlon, but still feeling too tired in the mornings to actually get started. waking up a little earlier in the mornings, and trying to shift my sleep cycle (and the quiet house is a definate plus too)

too hot a day to wear her in the sling, and unwilling to hang out in the stroller, i put her in the swing to free my hands for pushing her sister. she loved it. i breathed a sigh of relief.

my girls size each other up - the first signs of my little one really understanding her sister's presence. one looks so little in the swing, the other so big. i continue to be amazed at how much bigger she now seems. it's all about perspective. but then again, itsn't it always?